Be Clear (and Therefore Kind) at Your Independent School

As we think about our experience as independent school administrators, our work at 38 House, as well as in our daily lives, the phrase “being clear is being kind” resonates nearly every day. Here’s what we mean…

Depending on your independent school role, you may be communicating with prospective parents, your internal school community, or your alumni and other supporters of the school. In every one of those roles, communication is key. Clear, kind communication in a leadership context is not about softening the message, but more about respecting the people receiving it. When you’re clear, you show that you value your audience’s time, perspective, and need for understanding. Being clear should never leave folks needing to interpret, assume, or guess the messages you are communicating. 

Admissions & Enrollment

As we think about communicating clearly during the admissions process, here are a few examples or situations to consider. First and foremost, is your website clearly communicating to families your school’s uniqueness and what’s important to your community? Secondly, and maybe more importantly, can a family find the inquiry form and understand the admission process? We’ve spoken previously about “journey mapping”, and how the roadmap for admission ought to be clear and understandable, especially if the family is not familiar with how independent schools operate. As the first contact for most new families, how they are treated sets families up for success.

The School Community 

Internally, communicating with your faculty and staff, parents, and students shows up in various ways. You need to communicate expectations and feedback clearly to faculty members. Parents must know their own expectations and what they should (and shouldn’t) do in their partnership with the school. Students must have a clear understanding of the dress code, honor code, and what’s expected of them. These are all situations where with clear communication trust is built, and along with it, a stronger and more cohesive community. When clarity or communications are lacking, a lack of trust, confusion, and the rumor mill fill the void.

Advancement & Development

In advancement and development teams, clarity can be an ultimate form of kindness. Your donors and supporters want to clearly understand where their donations and time are being utilized. Is your capital campaign case for support clear and compelling? Are the institutional priorities clearly defined and communicated effectively by your advancement officers? Taking the time to evaluate and if needed, rework your messaging to be more clear, will be worth the effort. 

Giving Feedback

This final point applies to nearly all of your professional interactions: giving feedback. As a school leader, you need to give clear and actionable feedback to your direct reports and other stakeholders. If you’re working with an outside agency like 38 House, your ability to give clear feedback directly affects the success of our projects. 

Try your best to never fall into the trap of, “I can’t tell you what this should look like, but I know that this isn’t it.” It is lazy to give poor or indirect feedback. It wastes your resources and burns out your staff and partners.

Tips for Being Clear 

Communicating clearly and giving great feedback is something you must practice and develop. Most often, it requires dedicating some actual time and thought into what you like and don’t like about whatever you’re critiquing. It also requires finding the language for whatever feeling you have. One trick is finding a third party (even a spouse or partner) who can be a sounding board as you describe what you like or don’t like about something.

It’s not always easy to find the words to communicate clearly, but it’s absolutely worth the effort.